things gone wrong

Where did everything go wrong I seem to be stuck on repeat Like some sad old country song. I'm Tired of this rat race Where I always seem to finish last And get left feeling like a disgrace. 1 step forward and 3 steps back I never quite get ahead Who wants to live like that? normal is all I want to be Do mundane, run of the mill, everyday things But I guess God has other plans for me. I walk around constantly confused Giving everyone,and everything my all But still all I ever get is used. I'm tired and worn out My heart and brain have all but given up My spirit is gone, Plauged and ruined by self doubt. I cant blame people for walking way How could I? If I had a choice, I would not stay. Sometimes I worry, others I'm plain damn scared Of what I might do if things dont change I wish I just had one person that actually cared. Am I asking too much I just want to be loved a little Touching, holding hand ,kissing and such. Some days are worse than others, Today for instance I don't know how I will survive another .