Silent Suffering

I cry out to You,
I beg and plead
why do You not answer?
Am I just a bad seed.
Is it because You know,
because You are able to see
the darkness within
the Devil inside of me?
He tears me to shreds
he rips me apart
fills me with such anger
while slowly hardening my heart!
He fills my mind with evil thoughts
fills it with uncertainty and despair
causes me to doubt myself
makes it to where i don't even care!
But in my darkest hour ,
I still I turn to You
begging for help from down on my knees,
looking for answers or perhaps a clue.
I try to be good
I try to fight the demons within
somehow i always fall short
and succumb to sin.
For I am a sinner
but you know my heart,
I want to do the right thing
I just don't know where to start.
Lord I am begging you ,
I need your guidance.
I am your humble servant ,
please dont leave me suffering in silence.